Zakaj si pozabila biti TI
Ti, ki tiho in molče živiš, odstrani masko z obraza. Ti, ki skrivaš najbolj nežne nasmehe za nova jutra, razumi, da je življenje kot najlepša steklena vaza. Kadarkoli vanjo postaviš najlepše rože, moraš biti previdna, saj jo lahko le eno napačno, a dovolj močno gibanjerazbije na koščke. Pozabite na nove dni, pozabite na srčne rane. Življenje teče kot reka in na tej poti nikogar ne čaka. Mi praviš, da so te tako ali tako razbili na tisoče kosov in nimaš moči, da bi se sestavila? Ampak, zapomni si: “Vedno dovoli, da se duša sestavi, vedno poišči tisti zavrženi kos, ki bo napolnil praznino in dal tvojemu življenju drugačno lekcijo.” Ti, ki se bojiš povedati, kaj želiš, da ti drugi ne bodo sodili. Ali živiš zanje ali živiš zase? Želiš, da govorijo o tebi znani in neznani ali želiš pustiti pečat v svetu? Ti, ki skrivaš solze, kot da nosiš vso žalost tega sveta na svojem hrbtu. Vedi, da se duša zdravi in raste s solzami, in da so »krivice«, ki ti jih naredijo drugi, tvoje lekcije. Zato vzemi najboljše od teh ljudi, odpusti jim najslabše in pojdite po svoji poti. Izjoči svojo dušo na ramenu nekoga dragega, pomiri se in kreni v boj, da “popraviš” tiste najpomembnejše odnose. Življenje nikomur ne ostane dolžno, vsak greh nas z leti doleti, toda če narediš dobro in prav, boš omilila dolg svoje duše.
Ti, ki si trpela, ki se še naprej sprašuješ, kaj bi lahko bilo, a ni. Vedi, da si tukaj, kjer je tvoja duša izbrala biti. Razumi, da je vse velika uganka, del po del, strah za strahom, zapiraš in odpiraš nova vrata. Ni moglo in ni bilo potrebno biti drugače. Tu, kjer si sedaj, si priznaj, kako zelo si v bistvu TI, kako srečna si v resnici, saj bi lahko bilo drugače – lahko bi bilo tudi veliko slabše. Ti, ki se ne sprijazniš s krivico in dovoliš svoji duši, da vsak dan joka in se lomi na koščke. Da, tebe mislim – samo ne obupaj! Zaradi takšnih ljudi, kot si ti in takšnih, kot sem jaz, bo življenje postalo boljše mesto za življenje. Podeli tolažbo, četudi je ne iščejo, podeli nasmeh, dovoli si, da se smeješ brez razloga. Vsaka tvoja solza je blagoslov, vsaka tvoja nervoza je dokaz, da si še vedno živa in da ti ni vseeno. Pod oklepom te močne osebe, še naprej bije otroško srce, polno upanja in sanj.
Zakaj si prenehala sanjati in se dotikati ljudi s svojimi besedami in toplino? Nekoč si prisegla in si rekla, da ne boš nikoli postala takšna kot oni – žalostni klovni. A kdo si zdaj? Obriši si šminko z obraza, ne bodi kot klovn, ampak se nasmej kot iskrena in močna ženska, kakršna si. Vse bo enkrat minilo, a mi bomo ostali nekje v drugem času. Razumi že enkrat, da nisi marioneta, nisi rojena, da bi bila popolna, ampak avtentična. Premikaj lastne gore, podiraj lastne meje, gradi svoje gradove. Na koncu tisto, kar ostane – tisto si TI.
Tea Snežana Novoselnik
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